Let me tell you a story...

[Daniela 783]

... about a little man named Scleritis. He recently made a grave mistake by deciding to gun for an enemy that he simply lacked the technology to defeat: me (and @Brian). However, in order to fully comprehend the downfall of Scleritis, we need to back up a little bit and take a look at who he is, how he is nested in Tempest clan, analyse the context and try to understand what may have been the triggers that caused him to set himself up for failure and torment.

 

1. Background story

The character that we are looking at in this topic is your typical maxed runescape geek who takes pleasure in the simple activity of grinding skills on runescape.com. He is not known to be a huge teamplayer but up until recently people were willing to accept this. As for his real life, he recently shared with us his favoring of skinny jeans over normal jeans that are usually worn by adult human males, and posted his real life picture along with it. To his surprise, his physique and taste in clothes did not yield the positive response he may have hoped for, a traumatizing rejection which could have laid the path for the recent debacle.

Spoiler

1.1. Scleritis and Tempest

Within Tempest clan, Scleritis is best known for slinging mass highlights in discord as well as crying about men in suits slinging mass highlights in discord. Additionally, he also often whines about "mods powerabusing", which is undoubtedly his signature contribution to Tempest clan, resulting in the implementation of GITMO - iykyk and if you don't know then trust me, you don't want to know.

To help everyone understand who Scleritis is within the clan, I have uncovered this short photographic evidence for illustration: 

 

 

1.2. The beginning of the end

After consulting with my fellow analyst @Brian, I have managed to identify a crucial key event in the undoing of Scleritis. In September, Scleritis was unusually active in discord, something that the data suggests was out of character, as he is not a frequent contender for top 10 spots due to his inability to keep up the pace. We do believe that this sudden fame and success may have messed up Scleritis' neurological chemistry to a point beyond repair, enabling what was to come in the weeks after.

 

2. The PvM Comp

Our hardworking men in suits put together the technology for a PvM competition vs another runescape.com guild with the intention of providing a framework for community bonding, the development and deepening of friendships, enhancing the team spirit of Tempest clan and as a minor side goal, accumulation of wealth in the form of rs gp. However, as most of you probably expect by this point, Scleritis did not care about the main objectives regarding our Human Resources, he only cared about enriching himself even if it meant walking over other people. Let me map it out for you:

 

2.1. The Armadyl hilt incident

Scleritis' lack of team spirit became brutally evident when he, along with 2 hard working and truly team-spirited Tempest members (fluke and bomb), went to Armadyl godwars and got lucky enough to receive an (Armadyl) hilt drop in his name. Due to their kind nature, bomb and fluke most likely had no idea of the hell they had unleashed by allowing Scleritis to receive the drop, but they would shortly learn their lesson. As it turns out, Scleritis claimed the hilt drop as a solo drop and gave NO credit whatsoever to the kind men who had enabled him, resulting in the terrorizing of discord.
 

Spoiler

    

2.2. Losing friends, getting cocky, losing nerves...

Unfortunately, this unexpected dopamine release which Scleritis usually only knows from seeing the lvl 99 fireworks above his runescape.com character did not result in him becoming a more tolerable and likable person. On the contrary: it made him go mad. The insistence on being the carry of the armadyl group burnt a lot of bridges, and the more it went on, the more Scleritis felt like he was getting backed into a corner. He started lashing out at people, demanding that they assist him in his attempts at pvming to further his egoistic craving for wealth, not once considering that everybody else in Tempest clan was focussed on trying to win the competition as a team. Instead, in one of the many moments of Scleritis' blind rage, he called a competition of his own, provoked by 2 hardworking and humble community contributors who had attempted to bring him back on the right path - Brian and myself (team-spirited).

 

3. The declaration of war (blind rage)

I had only just set foot into PvMing after a long time away from the game (at this point I have to mention that I am not a maxed runescape player like Scleritis who is going for 200m in all skills right now) and dangling my toes into a bit of Zammy and corp without much luck, Scleritis thought it a good strategy to announce that he would finish the competition with more wealth to his name than I would achieve to my name. As if this outrageously cocky challenge had not already been enough, he also brought Brian's name into it, thinking he had an easy win in the back vs. 2 seasoned runescape.com veterans who are NOT geeky max capers like himself:

 

 

 

3.1. the war itself

In the following days, Scleritis made many attempts of achieving PvM drops but after he had shown his true colors during the Armadyl hilt incident (re. 2.1.), his fellow clanmates grew more and more reluctant to undergo any runescape.com monster killing activies with Scleritis. He announced several Armadyl trips with "the lads" but curiously enough, they never ended up taking place. To this day we still can't be sure who he was referring to, but it can't be ruled out that due to the previous trauma to his grey matter, parts of his personality had split off and taken their own form in his perception of reality, making him feel as if he had "lads" when truly it was just his own thoughts and feelings that had dissociated from his own being. Because he stopped talking on discord almost entirely, the analysts of Tempest clan concluded that he was multilogged at Armadyl by himself along with his other personalities to attempt achieving further PvM competition points and wealth, however, no topic was ever posted so we came to the conclusion that even the RNG had abandoned him.

Spoiler

4. The slow death of Scleritis

Unlike Scleritis, neither brian nor myself let the looming pressure of the competition get to us and we continued to go about our PvM strategy as originally intended. Due to myself playing on a group iron (I have lads that play runescape.com with unlike Scleritis) I decided to go barrows and a lot of drops came home, enough for me to overtake Scleritis in points, which he grew increasingly nervous about. As if that had not been enough, simultaneously brian took part in the slaying of corporal beast and stood over the dead body of the slain monster in the exact moment that a sigil was received, prompting one of Scleritis' typical hissy fits in private forums in which he lied about the circumstances of the sigil drop and brian's equal contribution to it in an attempt to get the wealth and points removed from brian:

 

 

After this attempt was not well received within the community, Scleritis began flaming other members of Tempest clan because he had begun to realize that he might not have the facilities to actually compete with brian and myself and seemingly felt the need to compensate. 

 

5. The nasty burial of Scleritis

It was a pleasant autumn night when Ned called a spontaneous visit to the corporal beast (which had previously been slain for another sigil drop by brian). Coincidentally I was awake at this late hour because I had been reflecting with my trusted PvM partner on how well this competition had gone for myself. At the time when Ned highlighted the channel, I felt it in my fingertips that ely would come home and it turned out to be the case.

 

 

2 hours later I was sitting on an additional 112m wealth and 10 extra points to my name, which would add up to the final results of the war as declared by Scleritis to be the following:

 

 

 

 

 

_________________________ 

 

Anyone who knows me knows that I am not a very competitive person and that I take most joy in being a humble, quiet and all time friendly community member (also team-spirited). In fact I can't even begin to express how I am THE MOST humble person and the best person at being non-competitive, so believe me when I say that it is incredibly out of character for me to admit that it has been a great pleasure to wipe the fucking floor with this pathetic little clown.

 

rest in piss skinny jeans wearing dramen staff looking ass idiot gl on 200m firemaking xp 🖕 (inv me if there's a drop party tho)

 

Edited November 1, 2021 by Daniela

[Scleritis 987]

dont care + ratio

[Joni 244]

Such a great post @Daniela 

[≈Flukejiver 1,195]

Scu cleared. Fuckin lol

[Mk 17 149]

Tldr but me n curtis went to god wars lots of times for drops when we feel it in our bones it comes home tbh 

[Titan 180]

literally the most unfunny topic ive ever read

 

edited me post coz I was a bit harsh on initial assessment but tbf u gotta sling up a pic of his massive round moon face for the proper bantz

 

I can respect the effort tho tbf

Edited November 1, 2021 by Titan

[Steikas 320]

Such a nice read it was,thanks @Daniela

[Howl 950]

@Scleritis in shambles

[≈Nick 609]

[Juri 486]

Strong moves by Daniela as always. 

[Justyn 446]

Damnnn ,mfoa

[John 281]

Damn scu what happen 

[Daniela 783]

53 minutes ago, Titan said:

literally the most unfunny topic ive ever read

 

edited me post coz I was a bit harsh on initial assessment but tbf u gotta sling up a pic of his massive round moon face for the proper bantz

 

I can respect the effort tho tbf

his face is right there lol

 

[Joe 254]

faking hell

 

ill read this when i need to sleep 

[Mitch 1,116]

What a riveting story. 10/10 would read again

Scu is a clown